Cleaning Up After the Dog

March 31, 2010 at 4:20 pm 1 comment

Here’s a poem for you that was emailed to me by Berry Manter.  Thanks Berry.  I just love this.  Perfect to set the tone for April Stool’s Day (this Saturday, April Turd of course, see poster for details).

Cleaning up after the Dog

by Jason Tandon

Pull plastic bag from pocket
and wave it like a flag

or diploma. Make sure many people
congratulate your care
for the community.

Check bag for holes.
Double check.

Inspect stool for odd hues.
Greens, blues, blood.

Evaluate consistency.

You don’t want to leave smears
on the sidewalk or grass-no prints.

Getaway must be clean.

Prepare to go in for all of it.
Hold breath.
Grab, clamp, reverse bag, twist, knot, cinch.

Smell hands.

Hold loaded bag high in the air,
assure onlookers that Everything is Okay.

If a cop should cruise by,
his crew cut bristling
in the sun,

hold that bag higher,
so he, too, can salute
your contribution.

The bomb diffused,
the world a little safer, a little cleaner,

will not offend the deep treads
of someone’s shoes.


Entry filed under: animal & human relationships, animal art & literature. Tags: , , .

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1 Comment Add your own

  • 1. Cassandra Lang  |  April 1, 2010 at 9:47 am

    LOVE IT!! – Thank you!

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